Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Confessions of a Book Whore: Do I feel lucky, well do ya, punk?



There is that one character, hands hovering over a gun in a deserted cowboy town, that you want to have a standoff with. “This book isn't big enough for the both of us” you mutter, in your best Clint Eastwood impersonation, with each turn of the page. Once you have finished beating your head against the wall, repeatedly, you concede and decide that this character is just too much for you, so you lunge the book at that wall and move on...? Or is that just me?

I have always said that a life is too short for a bad book; but life is shorter when the character makes you want to swallow broken glass. Today, heaven help me, I will confess the characters that irritate me the most... Cover your eyes; it’s going to get messy...


Don’t get me wrong, I don’t pick up a book hoping to place a Godfather-like hit on a character. There is always one character that sends me off the edge it could be a belief, a gripe or even a hair colour.


From Stephanie Meyer’s Bella Swan, whose whining really gets to me (Forgive me Twilight fans – but I blame Kirsten Stewart for this); David Nicholls’ One Day, Sylvie (Dexter’s wife/ex-wife); Cecily, in Lauren de Stefano’s Wither, the youngest of the sister wives; Mayella and Bob Ewell from Harper Lee’s To Kill a Mockingbird; and Ian McEwan’s Atonement, Paul Marshall.


The world would be a far happier place without the characters listed above, no doubt, and I would be a fair few grey hairs less should these characters have not waltzed across the page and caused a ruckus! I’d easily set up a dart board, pictures attached, and commence my target practice.

BUT, what if each of these characters were dramatically obliterated into oblivion, would Edward Cullen be cursed to roam the earth alone? Would Dexter and Emma have got together earlier? Would we have seen Rhine’s character, if it wasn't for the connection between her and Cecily? How would we have fallen in love with To Kill a Mockingbird if Harper Lee had skimped on the Horror? And would Atonement have been my favourite book if Paul Marshall hadn't set the wheels in motion for the plot that yanked me hither and yon? 

So as much as I despise these characters and, without a doubt, stomp off if they ever walked past me, each of the books wouldn't have made an impact if it weren’t for these characters. So love the characters you hate, because they set the wheels in motion that keep you glued!

(Thanks Bradley for the topic idea)



Which characters do you hate?

1 comments:

terri-maree said...

I have to congratulate you on yet another amazing book whore entry!! I concur when it comes to Bella, I wanted to stab my eyes out a la Oedipus, but just had to know what happens so didn't. Caroline, Bonnie and Meredith in the Vampire Diaries - they are just a bit too much. Mrs Lisbon in the Virgin Suicides - can she really not see that she is responsible for it all? Neferet in the House of Night Series. I actually find it hard naming characters I didn't like, as I do my best to forget them when I am done reading the book - they just vex me too much.

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